On contests

part I out of II

This entry was inspired by a post by the lovely Storm Owl. You can check it out (and the rest of her blog) here. 

I recently surprised myself by entering two pitch contests (Nestpitch and Pitchslam). Why? Because I'm always a pessimist when it comes to contests--all contests, not just writing ones.

I'm not a competitive person. I never liked applying for scholarships, internships, or anything where the chances of receiving something are low because you have a thousand other people, just as qualified as you, vying for your spot. I convince myself that the statistics are against me, and that I might as well not compete. After all, there are other methods of getting to places, methods that don't require contests.

However, being pessimistic also helps sometimes, for me at least. As in when I do enter, I have zero expectations. Obviously they'll rise every now and then, but I'm quick to squash them.

I was been extremely fortunate to be chosen as a finalist in Pitchslam, and even more fortunate for HESPERIA, my YA fantasy, to garner some interest from agents.

But the key is here is fortunate. Because I know what I'm going up against when it comes to pitch contests. I'll generalize and say that writers are really hard-working, smart, motivated people, and they make for fierce competition. They're cognizant of the market, able to whip out some super high-concept, hooky premises and even hookier pitches, no matter the length.

Generally speaking, a lot of writers' first pages rock.

Which is why I was nervous entering the ring with HESPERIA. Having written my own share of gripping (or my attempts at) first pages, I knew where HESPERIA would be at a disadvantage.

Voice: Hesperia herself as a character is more subtle. Her voice is naturally muted, suppressed by the years she's been groomed to become queen.

Pacing/Action/Intrigue: She's running from the imperial maids. No one has died yet, no wars have broken out. No one mysterious or dangerous has appeared. Hesperia's actions could easily be interpreted as frolicking through the gardens.

Pitch: My comp titles (which weren't even included) are TO KILL A MOCKINGBIRD meets GAME OF THRONES. Needless to say, the two don't exactly seem to mesh that well together at first glance and can leave the reader scratching her head. When it comes down to it, it's hard to package HESPERIA into a neat bundle of 35 words without stripping it down to its barest of bones and leaving stuff out--a lot of stuff out.

Do these things make HESPERIA a bad novel? No. The novel is certainly not perfect, but it accomplished my writer's vision and does what it needs to do.

The aforementioned things do not at all make HESPERIA a bad novel.

They DO, however, make it a harder novel to do well with in contests.

There will always be the manuscripts that are made for contests, just by nature of the premise, genre, characters, voice, etc. Granted, they may need some rewrites. They may need new beginnings. But at their cores, they can be contest-ready with some polish and shine.

Then there are the other manuscripts, the ones that aren't as photogenic in contests.

To clarify, I don't mean that these manuscripts will flounder and fail. First off, many are brilliant. Many of them will actually make it to the final rounds--I've seen it. But they require more work. Whatever the reason may be--bad timing, oversaturated genre, not as relatable characters--they are not as cooperative when you as a writer are trying to fit them into their best suits and dresses.

At that point, you have two choices. You can always (and I mean always) whip your manuscript into spectacular contest shape with the work. But sometimes, this may call for you to adjust your authorial vision. You might have to relinquish bits and pieces that you love. For example, you and your CP might love your first page, but it's not really doing its job in contests.

Do you change it? If you do, the contest-version first page might not necessarily be better that the first. It'll be better for contests and for the competitive contest atmosphere.

To sum up, always remember that "better" is relative once you've already poured the tears and sweat over your novel. You can't make everyone happy. Certain types of novels absolutely bask in contests and in front of audiences. And other types of novels are just as good but will fare better through different channels of achieving an agent/publication.

Have you ever had a novel that you worked hard on and personally loved, but didn't end up resonating with others?

When it all gets to be a bit too much

If you haven't noticed by now, I've sort of died.

My best friend of 12+ years knows that my biggest (and probably most annoying) flaw is hermitting. Yes, hermitting. It's similar to taking some time off to focus on "me-time", but sometimes that "me-time" stretches into months.

The writing community is awesome. But for one week last year, after feeling down about a past MS that I shelved and a new MS that my CP's loved but that I personally did not feel like was quite ready, I took a break. I told myself I just needed to get off the internet, stop checking my emails for query responses, stop blogging. I needed to clear my mind.

And that week turned into months. Months have turned into nearly a year.

I know, it's horrible.

Of course, there were other factors that went into the unexpectedly long break. College was becoming something very real and I could no longer think about it in an abstract way (oh my god, I got into college! Time to get senioritis). I reconciled with the fact that I was one step closer to having to deal with the "real world," and that my choices and actions for the next few years would ultimately decide if writing would remain a hobby or evolve to become something more.

My family also moved. We packed all our things from our house of twelve years and trucked them into a new house (or condo, for the sake of specificity). While it was by no means an across the country (or seas) move, people who know me know that I am absolutely horrible when it comes to adapting to change. The move went smoothly. I did erupt into hives. I did feel a weird emptiness inside of me. But yes, overall, it was a smooth move.

I also got into my first serious relationship. I've heard people talk about baby-brain, but relationship brain is a thing. I had always run into the occasional writers block, but this time I faced the worst creative low in my life. Sometime, I'll write a post on this. Anyway, while the relationship was (and still is!) awesome, I felt ashamed of the fact that it was sapping my writing motivation. I kept on trying to tell myself that if I could just gather the willpower, I COULD and WOULD write.

I failed miserably.

Lastly, however, was just fear. I felt bad about my writing. I felt bad about not seeing any results yet. I have a strong belief that anyone who starts writing young can't help but dream of being published young. I was no exception. And while I hadn't exactly shelved 3210321 novels, ILWF was doing worse than INGENICIDE in the query trenches, which was devastating since my CP's had vouched for it.

To give you a clearer picture, I sent out 80 queries for INGENICIDE. That number dropped to 30 for ILWF. I was scared, so, so scared of raking up rejections that I simply decided to put myself out there less to the number of closed doors.

Finishing my YA Fantasy WIP, HESPERIA, during this time was torturous. The words wouldn't come out, and what words did end up coming out did not sound right. I began to think that I not only could not gather the motivation to write anymore, but that I had become a worse writer.

I started video gaming. It was a hobby that both my boyfriend and I could share, and I met some new friends this way. But in truth, it was more than a hobby. It was something to fill the writing void, and I knew it.

I continued to hermit. I eventually reengaged with the writing community by stalking all my favorite writers' blogs. But I couldn't bring myself to comment or say anything. I admired the writing community from afar but no longer felt as if I could be a part of it. Everyone else seemed to be able to write despite having their own respective challenges and problems. I couldn't.

I know this post sounds really depressing,  but I promise you it isn't. Because going through this "dark period" in writing, I've learned something extremely valuable.

I will always write. Always. Because be it a month or a year, I always come back to my scrivener docs. And I can't help but write.

So I'm back. After a year of being dead, I'm back.

When it all gets to be a bit too much, do what you need to do. Whether that is take a break, go out for some air, find another hobby. Hermit if you need to. As I've told a friend countless of times, don't worry about whether or not you've made the right decision while you're taking that break. The answer will come to you. You'll know it one of two ways:

A. You're just immensely happier on your break (this was me with competitive running).
B. You'll be happy at first but the happiness won't last and you'll just know that something is missing from your life. When that feeling comes, you will know.

I knew that competitive running was not something I wanted to do for an extended period of my life. The stint in high school happened, and while it is not an experience I regret, I realize that the stress outweighed the happiness I got from it. For writing, however, I fall into category B, and I would have wanted nothing else. I am glad to be back, and I hope you will all receive me again.

THREE WISHES REVIEW

Happy Book Release, Deborah!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THREE WISHES GOODREADS BLURB: 

Tall and lanky, Genie Lowry is only noticed at academic awards assemblies—until the day she turns 17 1/2, when her body changes from Kate-Hudson-flat to Katy-Perry-curvy—and she finds out she’s a real, live genie. Suddenly, every guy at school is paying attention to her, including Pete Dillon, her never-in-a-million-years crush. 

But to gain her full powers and keep her new body, Genie has to find a master, and she’s not sure if Pete’s Master (or Mr.) Right. With help from her dead mother’s interactive diary and an imposing mentor with questionable motives, Genie uncovers the family history and genie rules she never knew. She grapples with her new powers and searches for the perfect master as she tries to make her own wishes come true.

Tis the season for cover reveals!!!!!!!!

And I give you the cover of my second and equally fantabulous CP's debut novel, SOULS ENTWINED!!!!

Souls Entwined

Coming April 30^th from Soul Mate Publishing

A Paranormal Romantic Suspense

I AM IN LOVE WITH THIS COVER. SO. MUCH. Everything from the detailing on the dagger to the flourishes on the S to the background color...jfkdajflajfdklahfajhdfa. After journeying with Anne from draft to publication, I can wholeheartedly say that she deserved this cover 200%.

COVER REVEAL FOR THE FANTABULOUS NOVEL OF MY EPICALLY AMAZING CRITIQUE PARTNER

(Annnnddd I know it's been ages since I've posted. I'm sorry :( Life has been overwhelming but in a wonderful way. I do hope to get back into the regular groove of blogging soon, so bear with me!)

So that's a long title...but I mean every word of it.

A little more than a year ago, I was a complete newbie writer as in I didn't have a CP (critique partner) for my then-finished manuscript. I did a bit of research and trolled around some sites and somehow, the stars managed to align and the amazing Deborah Krieser reached out to me and my other CP, Anne B. Cole. 

We went through the usual and conventional CP match-up process of emailing each other about ourselves and swapping some of our work.

Did it work out?