October: Pitch Wars and a month in review

Many a time during October, I imagined myself writing this post. How triumphant I would feel, knowing that I had survived.

And now I finally get to write it! Albeit sick. But I have my tumbler of warm liquids close by and fuzzy socks on, so it's not too bad. 

So if you've read this post, then you know that October was off the crazy charts. I was college counseling three students who are not native English speakers. I had to comprehensively + line-edit all their essays. It was fun but, as you can probably imagine, quite a bit of work. I also had college going on the in background, and the usual onslaught of readings and exams.

And then I had Pitch Wars.

I've heard about various revision experiences, from getting a few line edits to changing the POV entirely to tearing out sections and rewriting. I'll be upfront and say that I did not have to rewrite my book, and so I guess I could have had it worse in terms of work-load. My biggest/hardest edit was increasing the tension and pacing in the beginning.  

At the same time, I am a notoriously slow reviser. First, I take a lot of time to mull over solutions. Then I take a lot of time to implement them because I mull over word choice and other nit-gritty things like that. I am also a slower drafter. Basically, I am slow at everything.

So despite the comparatively "smaller" revision, I ended up slaving over it. 

Going into October, I realized that I had all of this on my plate. And since I like placing a lot of stress on myself, I resolved that I would not let anything slide. I would give my kids all the counseling that they needed. I would get the grades I wanted. I would complete PW to my satisfaction.

And now I'm glad to say that I kept my promise to myself!

(With the exception of one exam that I'm pretty sure I did not do so hot on, but that was an early November exam, so not officially part of the October crazies).

I think the key to staying somewhat sane (the bf would argue otherwise and say that I was not sane at all) is to remember to do the little things. For example, I rarely paint my nails during the summer, but come fall and winter, there's just something satisfying about having nice nails to go with my sweaters. So despite not having that much time, I tried to take a little time for myself every other week to paint my nails. I even got some new Essie colors to inspire me!

That might sound like something really small, and I agree it was. I had to give up some bigger things. My fall break is one example. While my roommates from Texas and New Jersey all left to go home for their fall break, I stayed at my dorm for the majority of it even though I live twenty minutes away. I decided to use that quiet time to work on revisions, and I'm glad to say that I got a lot done during those days! When everyone returned, refreshed, I was anything but refreshed, but sometimes you can't have everything (even I recognize that). 

But the thing about giving things up to accomplish something is to make sure that you then celebrate your accomplishment. I fall victim to getting swept into the frenzy of everything and not truly savoring my accomplishments. This time I was determined so carve out some time and not fall into that habit. 

So three of my good friends and I went to Linvilla Orchards for apple picking. This is the place that I used to go to for my birthday as a kid. It's been years since I last went. 

I actually didn't end up picking/buying any apples, but it was still incredibly fun. We all went out to dinner afterwards, and then I splurged on some fancy tea. 

In the end, was it a rough month? Yes, it was. Probably the roughest month of all time. But was it worth it? Yes, a thousand times.

And I couldn't have done it without the support of all the various people in my life. Thank you to:

- My parents, who realized that I wasn't eating as well as I should have. My mom, who works close to my college campus, took me out to lunch many a time during the month. She also read through the first 50 of HESPERIA again when I asked her to evaluate the changes. 

- My CP's Molly, Laura, Anne, and Deb. Some of you have read HESPERIA as I was writing it, some have read later drafts, but no matter what time of the MS I found you at, you have all helped it grow so much. 

- My fellow writer friends who have been so supportive on fb and twitter.

- My biffles Sean and Cindy, who remind me to have fun even when I'm all grumpy and convinced that there is no time for fun. 

- The Pitch Wars mentee community. You guys are the bomb. I'm neither the most social person ever nor the person who posts the wittiest and funniest posts, and so sometimes I find fb groups intimidating, but I'm so, so glad that this community is one that I feel like I'll turn to for a longgggg time. Thanks for all the hugfests, guys :)

- My mentor Mara, who literally opened this golden door of opportunity for me. Her fierce championing of the manuscript still blows me away sometimes, and I still have to pinch myself to believe it's real. Without her, this post wouldn't exist. Without her, I wouldn't have had the chance to go on this journey of my life. So thank you. Thank you.

- And lastly, the bf I've mentioned before. He's worn many hats for me--beta reader, idea brainstormer, restaurant exploring partner, cheerleader, and best hug-giver. We just celebrated 1.5 years together today, so he's really had a chance to see all the scary that is involved in the journey of a writer seeking publication.

Luckily, I haven't scared him away yet :D

How was your October?

2015 PitchWars Mentee Blog Hop: The Inspiration Behind HESPERIA

If you'd like to learn more about HESPERIA, here are some older posts on the MS:

-Nanowrimo Check-in #1 (where I talk about the conception of HESPERIA)

-Nanowrimo Check-in #2 (where you get to read an excerpt from draft #1)

-Post-Manuscript Completion Thoughts (where I get quite emotional over the roller-coaster that was the drafting process of HESPERIA)

-On Contests (where I talk about how HESPERIA fared in PitchSlam)

-Diversity in YA and my reservations (where I talk about the way I feature diversity in HESPERIA and how it doesn't really fit the conventional mold of "Asian characters")

This amazing art is by SansaXIX. Check out her profile for more.

As you can tell, this isn't the first time I'm talking about this MS on the blog, so I'll try to keep this post from becoming long-winded like all my other posts (and of course, I've probably jinxed myself by saying that). 

But yes, feel free to check out my other posts on the journey that this MS has been through.

Now to the point of this blog hop. HESPERIA, unlike some of my other MS's, didn't arise from a particular scene that I dreamed of or envisioned. Instead, I was very stuck in my other MS, THE SERENDIPITY LABS (description in my Novels tab). I took a break, during which I did a lot of knitting--finished my first scarf, in fact!--and Asian drama watching.

My favorite genre of Asian drama is wuxia, which basically translates into swords/historical/fantasy. And I especially love the dramas that have a bit of action but are grounded in political intrigue. Which means I loveeeee dramas set in the imperial palace, or during a particular dynasty. 

So I finished my 59 episode binge of Legend of Lu Zhen. It wasn't the greatest--there was a lot of petty drama between the different consorts and maids, which is meh--but I still enjoyed it. It got me thinking that I wished that there could be an China-inspired fantasy with the production values of, say, Game of Thrones. Because that would totally rock. There are so many inspiration-serving Chinese legends and classics and epics as a result of its enormous history. So many of those legends and classics (such as Water Margin, Dream of the Red Chamber, Journey to the West) are unaccessible to Western audiences, however, not because they haven't been translated, but I suspect because of cultural barriers. Plus, being classics, they aren't really...as palatable or easy to get into as YA fiction. I certainly haven't read those monsters--I've watched drama adaptations of them.

With the thought of something Asian inspired and something classical in my mind, an idea suddenly hit me. Why not take a really popular and pretty accessible Western novel in the classical canon, fantasify it, and give it an Asian twist? By the way, I thought I was sooo clever when I thought of doing a "retelling" of a classic, since there were so many fairytale retellings out there but not as many classic retellings (other than Shakespeare ones and Jane Austen ones). Well turns out I'm not so clever because as HuffPost shows, classic retellings are going to be a big thing in 2016. 

*weeps*

(I see now how my posts grow so long-winded)

Anyway, I settled on To Kill a Mockingbird because I really enjoyed the themes of the book and how they were delivered so innocently and simply. The court scene chapters were also some of my favorites to ever read in any classic, and I thought it'd be really cool to incorporate them in a fantasy setting and infuse them with political intrigue.

And the rest is history.

I'd say that the themes in HESPERIA are pretty clear, and you can probably tell the TKAM influence if you read it. For example, Hesperia's prejudice and discrimination toward her half-brother Roon serve to represent a microcosm of the prejudice and discrimination rampant in the book against the seers and magicians. It's only when she starts realizing that people only discriminate because of their own insecurities (in the case of Hesperia, the friction between her blood-brother and not being loved by her own mother. For the people of the kingdom, it's insecurity about their safety and peace) that she is able start to overcome her prejudice toward the seers and magicians.

There are some pretty crucial parts of the trials that mirror the trials in TKAM.

And if you pay attention to some of the characters, you'll see that some have been inspired by characters in TKAM (namely Roon and the Damalee = Boo Radley, Warnick = Tom Robinson).

Okay, I'm done! Didn't mean for that to turn into an analysis of literature. Many of my blog readers are people who've stuck with me through thick and thin, and so hopefully this is sort of interesting to you, especially if you've read the MS :)

Check out the rest of the Mentees' posts here. 

Diversity in YA and my reservations

Can we just admire this artwork for a moment...check out the artist HERE.

By now, most writers and readers are aware of the #WeNeedDiverseBooks movement. Others have already tossed their two cents into the pot, so I though I'd add mine.

DISCLAIMER: In general, I love the idea of the movement. My parents are Chinese and I grew up in a Chinese household, and I resorted to Asian dramas for my dose of Asian characters and leads. As a kid, I never really gave the lack of Asian characters in MG/YA books much thought. But as an older writer and reader of the YA genre, I do notice it. With the pretty healthy state that the YA market is currently in, I agree that it is time to see if we can introduce some variation into the already great stuff that is out there.

But (and from the title of this post, you probably already guessed that there would be a "but") I also have some reservations over the WNDB movement.

What mainly got me thinking about my feelings regarding the movement is the current novel that I am querying: HESPERIA. It's set in a cross between Rome and China (because why not?), and when building the world, I drew upon a lot of my own cultural currency. Those random Asian dramas I watched? Inspiration. Food I ate everyday as a kid and thought it was the norm? Inspiration. The adages of the culture, the general teachings and values? Inspiration.

And it shows in HESPERIA. Readers have consistently praised the world-building. One of my very trusted readers went on to point out that since I do such a lovely job of introducing the Asian element to my world, why not apply the same to my characters?

To give you a sense of where this comment may have come from, I'll let you know that I don't describe what the characters look like all that much in HESPERIA. This was mainly due to theme purposes (HESPERIA was heavily inspired by TO KILL A MOCKINGBIRD, and so while in TKAM skin color is a pretty big defining characteristic, in HESPERIA seer and magicians vs normal humans is the big defining characteristic, and I didn't want to spend too much time describing differences in looks). It was also a result of personal style--in general I don't like describing the looks of my characters since I trust that the reader will conjure his or her own image regardless, although I can definitely see why a well-drawn out character can make that conjuring process easier.

Second, none of my character names are traditionally Asian. As in, if you took a glance at the name, you wouldn't immediately think this character is Asian. I pulled a lot of the names from my imagination. Since the setting is mainly China influenced, I used some Latin in the creation of my names and some Roman culture in creating the world's justice system.

Anyway, this astute reader of mine pointed out to me that fantasy set in other cultures is huge, and so having more Asian main characters would really help me out in the market.

So I considered amping up the Asian factor in the characters via names and appearances.

And in the end, while I could see the benefits, I decided not to.

Why? Because I realized that I hadn't just gravitated toward the names I picked because I'm inundated with white-washed media or couldn't think of anything good. The non-Asian names, rather, were a conscious choice. While my characters might "fit the bill" (I really dislike how that sounds) as coming from a diverse setting and culture, I don't want to feel pressure to squeeze them into the names they should have to be considered diverse, or the skin colors/eye colors/hair colors that they should have to be considered diverse.

For example, many of the Asians I know don't have Asian names, and many decide not to conform to certain Asian cultural constructs, but they are no less Asian than any other Asians.

My Asian characters can have blonde hair and red eyes for all I care.

And as for all the other Asian elements that I included in the novel? They were also conscious choices. My characters are Asian influenced because they struggle a lot with the whole independence vs conform to society thing (which is actually a direct throwback to Confucianism). They will always think of the ripple effects their own decisions can have on the people around. They eat lychees and water-chestnuts and congee sprinkled with scallions. White is the color for funerals. Silk is the #1 preferred fabric for anyone with some money. But as an Asian myself, I realize that even by typing this out I risk drawing lines around what constitutes as Asian and what doesn't. I risk slapping a specific label onto what is means to be diverse.

Reading offers you the chance to live a life that you might never live in the real world. It allows you to see through the other's eyes and walk in his or her shoes (cliche as it sounds, that's the ultimate goal of a realistic character). Which is why, mostly speaking, I'm so excited that the industry is recognizing the need for expanding the possible horizons readers can explore. I am excited about the diversity movement--I dare not call it a trend because that implies it will eventually die out. Something as important as this should never die out.

But honestly, I'm also very scared. Because it's so incredibly easy to try to fit diversity into a box, to slap a bunch of labels as to what exactly constitutes as diversity. This contradicts entirely what the whole diversity movement is about. But it will happen--and it has. Because while we're lauding the books that explore subjects such as sexuality and race (which we should do and continue to do), it's harder to recognize all the definitions of diversity.

We continue to marginalize the heroine who is too "passive" or too "selfish" or too, dare I say, "unlikeable".  I've read so many reviews where the majority of the review criticizes the character. But...isn't diversity also diversity in character?

For example, very few reviews would say: "I hated him because he was too disabled!"

But so many reviews say: "I hated X character because of Y personality quality she had."

But I would argue that personality is diversity. The specific decisions you gravitate towards, the way you present yourself, the things you like and dislike, are all influenced by your socio-economic background, your physical (dis)abilities, your sexual orientation, your race, your culture, your environment.

The latter list we praise as diversity. We praise it so much that they become the keystones of the diversity movement. But when we reduce diversity down to any "essential element", we risk distorting the real purpose of the mission.

*In case you were wondering, I LOVE the reader I mentioned in this post--she is so very well-read in the YA genre and awesome at giving me crit that actually makes me excited about revision :D Her comment just indirectly prompted my thinking, which resulted in this word spew (as if any of my posts weren't word spews).

What are YOUR thoughts about diversity in YA and the recent movement? I'd love to hear your thoughts--both assenting and differing opinions :)

On contests

part I out of II

This entry was inspired by a post by the lovely Storm Owl. You can check it out (and the rest of her blog) here. 

I recently surprised myself by entering two pitch contests (Nestpitch and Pitchslam). Why? Because I'm always a pessimist when it comes to contests--all contests, not just writing ones.

I'm not a competitive person. I never liked applying for scholarships, internships, or anything where the chances of receiving something are low because you have a thousand other people, just as qualified as you, vying for your spot. I convince myself that the statistics are against me, and that I might as well not compete. After all, there are other methods of getting to places, methods that don't require contests.

However, being pessimistic also helps sometimes, for me at least. As in when I do enter, I have zero expectations. Obviously they'll rise every now and then, but I'm quick to squash them.

I was been extremely fortunate to be chosen as a finalist in Pitchslam, and even more fortunate for HESPERIA, my YA fantasy, to garner some interest from agents.

But the key is here is fortunate. Because I know what I'm going up against when it comes to pitch contests. I'll generalize and say that writers are really hard-working, smart, motivated people, and they make for fierce competition. They're cognizant of the market, able to whip out some super high-concept, hooky premises and even hookier pitches, no matter the length.

Generally speaking, a lot of writers' first pages rock.

Which is why I was nervous entering the ring with HESPERIA. Having written my own share of gripping (or my attempts at) first pages, I knew where HESPERIA would be at a disadvantage.

Voice: Hesperia herself as a character is more subtle. Her voice is naturally muted, suppressed by the years she's been groomed to become queen.

Pacing/Action/Intrigue: She's running from the imperial maids. No one has died yet, no wars have broken out. No one mysterious or dangerous has appeared. Hesperia's actions could easily be interpreted as frolicking through the gardens.

Pitch: My comp titles (which weren't even included) are TO KILL A MOCKINGBIRD meets GAME OF THRONES. Needless to say, the two don't exactly seem to mesh that well together at first glance and can leave the reader scratching her head. When it comes down to it, it's hard to package HESPERIA into a neat bundle of 35 words without stripping it down to its barest of bones and leaving stuff out--a lot of stuff out.

Do these things make HESPERIA a bad novel? No. The novel is certainly not perfect, but it accomplished my writer's vision and does what it needs to do.

The aforementioned things do not at all make HESPERIA a bad novel.

They DO, however, make it a harder novel to do well with in contests.

There will always be the manuscripts that are made for contests, just by nature of the premise, genre, characters, voice, etc. Granted, they may need some rewrites. They may need new beginnings. But at their cores, they can be contest-ready with some polish and shine.

Then there are the other manuscripts, the ones that aren't as photogenic in contests.

To clarify, I don't mean that these manuscripts will flounder and fail. First off, many are brilliant. Many of them will actually make it to the final rounds--I've seen it. But they require more work. Whatever the reason may be--bad timing, oversaturated genre, not as relatable characters--they are not as cooperative when you as a writer are trying to fit them into their best suits and dresses.

At that point, you have two choices. You can always (and I mean always) whip your manuscript into spectacular contest shape with the work. But sometimes, this may call for you to adjust your authorial vision. You might have to relinquish bits and pieces that you love. For example, you and your CP might love your first page, but it's not really doing its job in contests.

Do you change it? If you do, the contest-version first page might not necessarily be better that the first. It'll be better for contests and for the competitive contest atmosphere.

To sum up, always remember that "better" is relative once you've already poured the tears and sweat over your novel. You can't make everyone happy. Certain types of novels absolutely bask in contests and in front of audiences. And other types of novels are just as good but will fare better through different channels of achieving an agent/publication.

Have you ever had a novel that you worked hard on and personally loved, but didn't end up resonating with others?